Ewen’s Top 10 of 2009

Even Rocky Had A Montage

Even Rocky Had A Montage

1. Cormorant – Metazoa

If there is any justice in the world, Cormorant are set to be the biggest thing out of the Bay Area since 1983. Metazoa is a blinding mix of melodic death metal, hard rock, black metal & about 100 other genres. I really can’t recommend this album highly enough.

2. Megadeth – Endgame

Mustaine & co. are back on top. Endgame built on the last 2 ‘deth albums & shocked the world with this masterpiece of thrash domination, undoubtedly driven by the arrival of Broderick & his big sack o’ riffs. Mustaine had finally found someone to trade solos with that rivalled the might of Friedman.

3. Ravage – The End of Tomorrow

Heavy metal the way Priest used to make. Epic vocals, catchy hooks, insane shredding. It might not be anything new but it’s done so well that you don’t even care.

4.A?Ahab – The Divinity of Oceans

Nautical doom metal that often sails close to the shores of more extreme genres. Riffs the size of Moby Dick, melodic interludes & you’ve got an album ***BAD JOKE ALERT*** more epic that a Faith No More single.

5. Hospital of Death – Surge, Kill, Steal

H.O.D.’s bastard mix of heavy metal & early Exodus-style thrash along with their debut Beer Bitches Blood put them on the map but this album takes that map & shits all over it. Highlight track The King of Sweden is a soaring ode to the greatness of a certain Mr Malmsteen that features the line “Lots of twats play Fender Strats but he is the exception, he makes it cool because he rules & gives us all erections!” Nuff’ Said.

6. Immortal – All Shall Fall

Black metal’s second biggest band silenced 7 years of rumours & negativity by releasing All Shall Fall, an unrelenting modern classic with all the hallmarks of Immortal’s frost-ridden soundscapes.

7. Skeletonwitch – Breathing The Fire

Athens, Ohio’s finest sons released their 3rd album, Breathing The Fire cementing their reputation as blackened thrash’s kings last year. Maiden riffs, sweeps & some healthy palm muting mixed with Garnette’s growl for a perfect soundtrack to a beer-fuelled thrash-down.

8.A?Cauldron – Chained To The Night

See Number 3. All the same reasons apply.

9. W.A.S.P. – Babylon

I only gave this album 3.5 Grimmetts earlier in the year but it’s grown on me like that mould on the end of my dick. Blackie Lawless knows how to write a catchy tune that burrows into your brain stem & stays there for the next decade.

10. Gama Bomb – Tales From The Grave In Space

Free downloads don’t come much more awesome than this thrashtastic collection. It’s like if you chucked some B-Movies, comic books, Nuclear Assault & fuckload of beer into a blender & recorded the sound it made as it blended. Get it here!

Just Missing Out:

Shining – VI: Klagospalmer
Nile – Those Whom The Gods Detest
Swallow The Sun – New Moon
Saxon – Into The Labyrinth
Kreator – Hordes of Chaos
Heaven & Hell – The Devil You Know

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About The Author

A misanthropic cretin only capable of hate & compulsive masturbation. Follow or abuse him on Twitter or Last.fm. When he's not listening to obscure 80s thrash, he likes power ballads & torture porn.

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