Tag Archive: 2


Machine Head – Unto The Locust

Machine Head – Unto The Locust

Machine Head – Unto The Locust

Personally I like to top my shit sandwiches with a vomit mayo and a dash of grated cock meat but each to their own. Machine Head will doubtless have their own ideas, presented for us now and probably involving a combination of awkwardly composed choruses and poorly conceived rapping. Though Robb Flynn‘s promises of classical guitar lessons and technical ecstasy have at least mildly intrigued me…

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Mastodon – The Hunter

Mastodon – The Hunter

Mastodon – The Hunter

It’s come that time again, folks. I’ve crawled out from under my rock to hurl incoherent abuse at another poor old metal band who’ve committed the cardinal sin of doing something different. So what have they done to get me riled up enough to pull my shit encrusted fingers from my battered ringpiece & bother my keyboard? Wearing the wrong shoes? Not knowing the correct dance moves to Warriors of the World? Have an incomplete 180gm vinyl discography of Manilla Road? Let’s find out, shall we?

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Job For A Cowboy – Gloom EP

Job For A Cowboy – Gloom EP

Job For A Cowboy – Gloom EP

Once upon a time I liked Job For A Cowboy.

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Children of Bodom – Relentless Reckless Forever

Children of Bodom – Relentless Reckless Forever

I honestly have no idea who buys a Children Of Bodom album these days, even though a startling number do. Their flamboyant melodic death/power metal wizardry has been gradually diluted with generic mass appeal riffs, downtuning, sweary shout alongs and mid-pace mediocrity since Follow The Reaper, to the stage where it’s hard for me to muster even a wet fart of enthusiasm for anything bearing their name. As is always the way, the recent years of decline saw CoB rise massively in popularity and, despite a plethora of increasingly ropey, keyboard dependant live performances, saw Alexi Laiho elevated to the rank of guitar god by the slavering morons on Yoo Toob. Well done, World.

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Municipal Waste – Massive Aggressive

Municipal Waste – Massive Aggressive

Municipal Waste – Massive Aggressive

Despite being the best thing to come out of Richmond, Virginia since Earl Hebner, the latest Municipal Waste album is about as bland & unremarkable your average Paul Anka album. At no point in my repeated listens of it did I want to down a beer, punch out a police officer and dive face-first through a plate glass window. Where is the fucking party?

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